May 23, 2017

I don't know if any of you is aware of the fact that Italian blood runs through my veins. Yes, you've heard that right. I am Italian: I was born and raised in Italy.

Now, I know what you guys may think: "how cool is that!?" or "OMG I luuuuurv Italy!" and yes, Italy is great (not all of it is that dreamy as you may think, though!) but let me tell you, growing up in the capital country of mouth watering food is hard, especially if you're trying a diet and people pass in front of you at 8:00 a.m. with fresh bread to take home that leaves that awesome smell of everything you love, or when, in the middle of the night, you're out with your friends they decide to go for some gelato, something that obviously you can't eat because #diet.

I'm a binge-eater. I like to eat and honestly, Italy truly is the most amazing place when it comes to food (you people think New York does the best pizza, but try the Italian one and you'll be shocked at how goodelicious it is! Yes, a new term, deal with it.)
Pasta, bread, pizza, arancini, gelato, everything is a total reminder of how good food is and how miserable you look with that salad (not Caprese salad) and grilled chicken on your very sad table.

But I need this. I need to start a new and fresh relationship with food that does not cause me shame or sadness, that is why I decided now it's the right time.

I don't know about you people, but I find it hard to start a diet in winter. I don't know what it is, maybe it's because it's so cold that I need some comfort food or maybe it's because my mood shifts so much during winter that I need food to feel better. I don't know but it's hard.
Summer is different. As the days are brighter I feel like I need some freshness inside me, as in, in my belly. I need to start taking care of me, my body and what's a better way than start eating clean and fresh?

I remember three summers ago I lost 15 kilos. I know, shocking! And it really was shocking but most of all it felt good! I was able to put on some clothes that didn't fit anymore, and I was able to buy new clothes two sizes down, how amazing! Also, I was in love with someone so that really helped, but anyway, I felt beautiful and active and fresh and on top of the world.
I want to do that again. I want to feel amazing again. I want to look in the mirror and see myself and not every single part of my body I want to change or the fact that I don't have a jawline anymore.
That is why starting next month (cause I have therapy to start and finish this month) I am going to try to improve my body and this is exactly how I am going to do it.

Correction: no white bread.
And with that I am including pasta and pizza and everything similiar.
Now, why white bread and not bread in general?
Simple, because I need bread. I need carbs but I know that white bread is not good for my body, so I am not going to eat it.
Also, it's crazy how good I feel whenever I don't eat bread or potatoes or anything that has carbs but my body need those.

Do you remembe that episode of Gilmore Girls in which Lorelai is at the coffee shop (after arguing for the millionth time with Luke) and asks for coffee coffee coffee and the barista brings her three coffees? Well, that will be me every single day.
I love salads. Every kind of salad, I'm a huge lover of and I feel like summer is the best season to fuel your body with every type of salad existing in the world.
They are fresh, good for your body and honestly so delicious!
Carrot salads are the best if you need your belly to be full; they give you vitamins, fibers, and the feeling of being full the whole day!
How great!

Is that a boooooo I am hearing? No? Well, meybe is just my brain reminding me how I actually hate working out. But my body needs movement, my muscles need to be more involved and even if it's just a walk every single day, I am going to do it.
Gyms for me are the devil's caves. I hate being stared at, I mean, I know people don't stare at me, my body is overall fine, but I hate the feeling of suspect that people are watching me while I do stuff.
It makes me super conscious of the fact that I don't like how I look right now and I don't need that reminder, my mirror is mean enough.
What I discovere recently is that, there are so many workout course online, especially on Youtube that if I just stop for 30 minutes to watch book hauls I could seriously get my body back together and finally be happy with it.

I don't drink enough. And it's crazy how sometimes my mum asks me: "How much water have you been drinking today?" I would ask her "I drunk at luch!"
What? I know, right?
I don't drink enough, or for someone it may seems like I don't drink at all and it's true, I'm guilty of that and my headaches hate me for that.
Water is important and I have to remind myself of that.

I love staying home. I love my couch, my blog, my books.
As a writer I do spend the majority of my time at my desk, stending up just to go to the loo or to eat (which sometimes happens at that same desk)
The fact that my friends are away for Uni or work or travelling the world has translated for me into staying home, talking to friends online (mostly Twitter) and writing.
I always thought that I needed a reason to get outside: grocery shopping, book buying, seeing friends. But lately I have been thinking about it and I slapped myself in the face. I don't need reasons to get out, what I need is fresh air and a nice walk around the neighborhood. These days walking outside alone (especially for women) has become dangerous in Italy, so I tremble at the only thought of walking out the door but I can count on my mum, she's always there for a walk or window shopping. Mostly window shopping.

Overall I'm cutting things that are bad for my body, things that helps my weight gain and eat everything that helps me lose whatever I have to lose. Sugar in general is banished, so no candies, no sweets, no chewing-gums. I am also following my blod type diet, which basically tells you what you should eat based on what your needs are.
Remember: your body tells you everything you need to know, just start paying more attention and give it what it needs.

These are all the changes I am planning to make to my lifesyle this upcoming Summer. Some of those may sound drastic, some easy but really hard for me. I will try and come out of it alive and victorious.
Are you too trying to get your body in shape? Do you have any advice? Also, I am no nutrician at all! So everything I write on this post is mainly with the help of a doctor or someone who knows about health and food.
If you want to try this, please keep in mind that we all have different bodies and different needs, so I suggest you to consult someone who knows more!

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